The Death of ROKNROL

I'm kind of weird in that I get pretty attached to the cars that I drive.  Since I drive all over the Midwest for my job, I usually get cars that are big and comfy - ones that get great gas mileage.  And I usually run 'em into the ground.  And with that, I write today to tell you that my 2000 Chevrolet Impala with 265,000 miles on it is dead.  It's been sitting in St. Louis for the past couple of months with transmission problems and it's going to cost a lot to fix it.  I don't want to pay that kind of money to get it fixed, so it's time to let it go and get a new ride. 

And with that, I'm pretty sad.  I've driven that Impala since it had 43 miles on it.  It was great in the snow and ice, it got 26 to 30 miles per gallon on the open road, and it had a sort of sexy and tough look to it.  It was beginning to nickle and dime me over the past few months having to replace the front axles, put in a new windshield wiper motor and a couple of other nuisance-type things.  Over the past couple of years, a few little things started to go out on.  But they were mostly creature comforts that I really didn't need in the first place, such as an external thermometer to tell me how hot or cold it was outside.  But the gas gauge was always registering between full and half-full, even when I was driving on fumes.  It was going to be nearly $600 bucks to replace the sensor in the gas tank.  I had to watch the mileage and the fuel used on my driver's information center just so I didn't run out of gas.

But driving the Impala was like walking two miles in a pair of old comfortable shoes.  It was a great car.  My boss even commented a couple three years ago that he couldn't believe how smooth and solid it was for a car that was approaching 200,000 miles.

I actually bought the car more for comfort and reliability, not just for the looks.  But I have to tell you that during the first couple years I owned the car, I had more people stop me when I was walking to or from the car and ask me about it and comment how nice it looked.  One time when we were going to Chicago for a weekend, an Illinois Highway Patrolman pulled me over for speeding - 74 in a 65.  He just gave me a warning, but then he said, "Say, how do you like this car?  They're talking about getting us Impala's for squad cars here in the coming months." 

As I said, I usually run my cars into the ground.  I take exceptional care of them, changing the oil every 3000 miles, making sure maintenance is kept up.  My cars have been my livelihood.  The car I had before the Impala, a 1994 Chevy Lumina Euro, had 242,000 miles on it when Cindy's dad bought it off of me as a "mud car".  As far as I know, it's still going today.  I had a 1986 Chevy Celebrity Eurosport that had 186,000 miles on it when I changed cars.  As you can see, there's a common thread of my cars that I've used since I've been on the road.  They're all Chevrolet's.  That's nearly 700,000 miles on three cars in a 20+ year period.  

That's a lot of road miles.  And with each of them, the motor was as sound on the last day I drove it as the day I drove 'em off the lot.   

I have never, ever, named any of the cars I've driven over the years.  I didn't call the Impala "Impy Impala" like some people would call their cars "Tommy Toyota" or "Subie Subaru" or "Mallie Malibu".  (You people know who you are.)  Since I got my personalized plates in 1987, my cars have all been known as "ROKNROL". 

Now, for those of you challenged by subliminal messages on license plates, it simply says, "Rock and Roll."  When Iowa first allowed personalized license plates in the 70's, they only had space for six letters.  Well, I think it's sort of dumb to have either your first name or last name on your license plates.  I think personalized plates should hold some sort of message that's unique to the person driving the vehicle.  The only problem is that the message I wanted needed seven letters.

I had a friend, Christine Moser, who worked at the Jasper County Treasurer's Office in Newton in the mid-80's.  We were talking one time about the personalized plates and I had a great idea for one, but I needed seven letters.  She said, "Well, they're talking about going to seven letters for the personalized plates sometime in the coming months.  What are you thinking about doing?"

I said, "It's so cool that I don't want anyone to get the idea from me.  I'll just wait until they become available."

It was the summer of 1987 and Chris called me at home.  "Willie, they've gone to seven letters.  They just announced it to all the Treasurers offices, but aren't going to make a public announcement for a few weeks.  Come up and get an application." 

I immediately went up to the office and filled out an application.  It only had six boxes and Chris said to just add a letter outside the last box.  My first choice was "ROKNROL" and my second choice was "ROCNROL".  She said, "Oh, that IS a cool plate!"  She then faxed it into the Iowa State Treasurer's Office.

It turned out that my request was one of the first in the state of Iowa - if not THE first in the state - with the new seven letter personalized plate.   Getting "ROKNROL" was going to be no problem.  The plates arrived about three weeks later and I've had "ROKNROL" ever since. 

(By the way, the Des Moines Register has a web site that has every personalized plates in the state of Iowa.  You can click here to take you to the site.)

Now, I had a girlfriend back at that time who thought people would think that "ROKNROL" would be pronounced "ROKE-N-ROLL" other than "ROCK-N-ROLL" because she had friends with the last name of Rokis, with the long "o".  She harped on me about it for nearly a year before I finally went back to Chris at the Treasurers Office and asked her if "ROCNROL" was available.  Christine said, "Nope, sorry.  Some guy up in Sioux City has it."  

Well, the girlfriend and I didn't last long after that, so it stayed "ROKNROL".  Oh, no one else thought it was "ROKE-N-ROLL" except her.  Sometimes I got the occasional old geezer who'd stop me after I got out of the car and say, "Now, what does that say on your license plate?" 

I get waves from young guys passing me who see the plates and I like the reaction some people have when I look in the rearview mirror after I've passed them.  "Rock and Roll!  All right, dude!"

So, I told you that story to tell you this one...

About ten years ago, I was in Sioux City a night before a business meeting.  I had run off from home without any dark dress socks in my travel bag, and I had to go out to Target and get a couple three pairs of socks.  I pulled into a parking stall and I popped out of the car.  A very nice '57 Chevy was rolling by slowly and the guy suddenly stopped and put it into reverse.  He said to me, "Hey, I like your license plates." 

I said, "Thanx.  I get that quite a bit."

He said, "Check out mine."

I went around the back of his car and, lo and behold, he was "ROCNROL".  I said, "Ah, you're the guy from Sioux City who has these plates."

He said, "Did you see mine and get the idea from these plates?"

I said, "Oh, no.  I had my choice of either 'ROKNROL' or 'ROCNROL' when I got these.

He was kind of taken aback my my statement and said, "What do you mean?"

I told him the story of how I had initially picked "ROKNROL" over "ROCNROL", but an old girlfriend was berating me constantly to the point that I had to see if "ROCNROL" was available.  But I was told a guy in Sioux City had the plates.  "And, obviously, you're that guy." 

He said, "Now, what do you mean that you had taken 'ROKNROL' over 'ROCNROL'?"

I told him that I'd had the plates since 1987, long before the official announcement for the seven letters on personalized plates had come out (it didn't come out until early 1988).   I said, "I had my pick of either 'ROKNROL' or 'ROCNROL'.  I took this one," pointing at my license plate.

Well, the guy became all flabbergasted and said, "But I came up with the idea for these plates.  I had them since 1988."

I said, "Yeah, I had a friend who worked in the Jasper County Treasurer's Office and she told me the day the county treasurers knew about going to seven letters that I could get them at that time.  I had 'em for about five or six months before the official announcement came out."  

Now, by this time, I thought the guy was going to cry.  He began to protest, "How can you do that?  I had these plates since the day they announced they were going to seven letters!  I thought this one up!"

I said, sorry, but I had inside information and if I had taken "ROCNROL" instead of "ROKNROL", he would have been disappointed back then to find that someone had already beaten him to the punch.

The guy was just beside himself.  It was like a little kid's reaction when they find out there really isn't a Santa Claus.   He put the car in gear, goosed it a bit, spun his rear tires and drove away.  I was just amazed at the conversation I'd just gone through.  The guy was seriously emotionally hurt that I had "ROKNROL" before he did.  He must have seriously thought that no one other than him could come up with that idea for a personalized plate.  While I'm not quite that psycho about my plates, I still think they're pretty cool. 

Now I'm in the hunt for a new car.  I've been driving some mini SUV's for the past few weeks from Hertz.  I've tried the Ford Edge, a Nissan Xterra and a Toyota RAV 4 - the same RAV 4, it turns out, that I drove in my Dakota Trip from last summer.  I don't like any of them.  Of the three, I liked the Ford the best, Toyota second and the Nissan a very distant third.  But none of them get good gas mileage and none of them are all that comfortable on long trips.  But they can haul big speakers when I need to get 'em from one place to another - much better than my current Impala.

I'm not overly enamored with the new body styling of the current Impala.  But the bottom line is that they're comfortable, they're reliable and they'll run for a long time.  That's exactly what I need.  I'm driving a Honda Accord right now.  While it's zippy, it's not big like an Impala.

The other neat thing I found out about the new Impala is that they have a new "flat seat" function with the rear seats that allow the bottom of the rear seats to tilt forward, allowing the back of the rear seats to come down fully flat to haul big items - like speakers.  The 2000 Impala allowed you to also fold the backs of the rear seats down, but they didn't fold flat.  I may not need to rent a mini-SUV again.

A new and improved "ROKNROL" is coming soon.  And it will have satellite radio now that the merger of XM Radio and Sirius has gone through.  Stay tuned...   

Comments

[Lynn S.]

Years ago, my brother had a restored 63 Chevy Impala convertable that had personalized plates that read MASTRB8. Once the state of Missouri figured out what it really said they made him change them. I was surprised they made it through the first time and no one picked up on it at the state.

[burph]

Sorry to hear about R squared,She was a beaut.

[Kristin]

RIP ROKNROL! Have you looked at the Ford Escape Hybrid? That's what your niece drives ... xoK